Parody lyrics for the classic song from Les Miserables to discourage the use of cell phones in entertainment venues.
(Enter Eponine, texting furiously)
EPONINE
On my phone
Pretending I’m important.
On my phone
Pretending that I’ve got friends.
Even though
I ought to watch the actors
I find Twitter so compelling that I
Cannot look away.
On my phone
And missing all the plot points.
On my phone
Ignoring the reprises.
For these seats
I paid two hundred dollars
But Facebook calls my name and I give
It all my attention.
And I know
I ought to shut it off
That I’m wasting this real life experience.
And although I’m acting like a jerk
Still I play Angry Birds non-stop.
(The rest of the company enters, pleading)
COMPANY
Please watch us
For when the play is over
We’ll be gone
You’ll miss all our hard work.
Without us
The world seems two dimensional
Those tiny screens are just a sorry
Substitute for drama.
EPONINE
I love it,
But every day I’m learning
That real life
Is better than a login.
Without it,
The world is more compelling
And full of real expriences
I have never known!
COMPANY
Please watch us.
Please watch us.
Please watch us.
And please turn off your phone.